My boss and his partner send their staff inspirational thoughts every so often. I really liked this one and thought it was very appropriate for this blog. I’m not sure of the source so I can’t give anyone credit, but Brent, who sent it to me. Good stuff.
Does the news bother you? Does all this economic turmoil bother you? Does the neighbor bother you? Do politicians bother you?
To the extent you can be bothered, to that extent you are agitated, nervous and anxious.
Agitation, nervousness, anxiety and a whole range of related feelings are such a part of life you might assume they’re normal. You might assume they are part of life. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Feeling bothered is not natural to you.
Feeling bothered is not natural to you even though it’s such a part of you it seems natural. Feelings that bother you are a foreign invader to your peaceful self.
What’s interesting is how you handle being bothered. A car alarm goes off, a dog won’t stop barking, you get a parking ticket, someone looks at you cross-eyed and you get bothered, annoyed, irritated. How do you handle those bothered feelings? Usually you get mad, furious, frustrated and more and more agitated.
You answer negative with more negative. If someone asked you if you like getting bothered by something or someone you would probably say, “No, I don’t like getting bothered.” Yet you react to a bother, which you see as negative, with more negative, getting yourself annoyed, irritated, angry.
You pile more negative on the negative, thinking somehow that helps you.
How does it help you? It doesn’t. It makes you more irritated, more negative. That’s how people live their life. Then they go to the pharmacist to take something for it. The world is shooting itself in the foot and wondering why their foot hurts.
Are you ready for something different? Are you ready for a different kind of life? Are you ready for a life where you can never be bothered? It is possible. But you do have to do something different.
First you have to see that the bother, the thing that bugs you is not the cause of you being bothered. The cause of your bother is YOU. Whatever happens out there can’t bother you unless you decide to be bothered. It’s not the thing. It’s your reaction to the thing. Reacting is negative and adds up to more negative for you.
What’s the solution? Make a decision. When bother comes knocking at your door don’t open the door and let it in. Let bother do whatever it does but you decide to not participate. Stay on the sidelines and watch the madness. You don’t have to join in.
You can only be bothered if you decide to be. Whatever happens, whatever someone does or says, it’s not a bother to you unless you decide to let it bother you, unless you shake hands with it and join in.
Remember, if you decide to let something bother you, you are hurting you. You’re not hurting whatever bothers you by getting bothered by it. Being bothered, nervous, anxious, upset, annoyed and frustrated does not help you. It does not make you more healthy, more wealthy or more loving. It makes you the opposite.
What’s the answer? When bother comes your way ignore it. Ignore it. Try it. Notice when you ignore it, it ignores you. Meaning when you ignore something that bothers you it no longer comes your way. Try it and find out.
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: Personal responsibility, Positive thinking
Thanks for posting that article! I loved it, it gave me a lot to contemplate. I remember being told once that when you are worried or upset about something you need to stop and consider if there is anything you can do right that moment to fix the problem. If there’s not you need to forget it and move on so that it doesn’t keep burdening your soul. The advice in this article sounds like something Merrilee would say to us. Oh how I miss her!
Yeah, I probably needed to here this. I have a tolerance level that is normally pretty high, but I think I have let it slip down lately. I just need to ignore bother.
p.s. It sure is easy to read “brother” when you see “bother”. Don’t get me wrong, my brothers don’t bother me. I love being around my brothers!
It’s like when Holden’s doing his high pitched yell (or when he was a tiny bebe and wouldn’t stop crying) I get filled with anxiety and stress and want to yell back or get mad. I have to mentally calm myself through the tantrum so I can handle it with equilibrium. It’s strange what a conscious process it is to not let negativity just pile up.